Sometimes Being a Mom is Hard

If I ask him not to knock the eggs around, then why does he pick them up?

If I tell her to walk beside me, then why does she skip merrily ahead?

Sometimes being a mom is hard. 

Sometimes I have very little patience. For anything.  Anyone.  

Sometimes I just want to crawl in my bedroom and hide.  From the world.  From everyone.

But when you're a mom, you can't just hide.  Kids, little kids, they need you.  They want you.  

You have to take them grocery shopping.  Which includes (but is not limited to) the following: getting dressed, putting on shoes, brushing teeth, going potty, getting dressed and putting on shoes a second time because a certain someone refuses to go potty unless he's completely naked from the waist down, washing hands, doing hair, feeding the baby, changing a diaper, packing the bag, herding my sheep to the minivan, putting an end to an argument about who gets to get in first and who gets to be buckled first, entertaining a one year old with electronic nonsense, and actually buckling them all in.  Because they are all still in car seats.  Then you realize the one year old just pooped.  Aaaand, you change your second diaper.  

Then you go to the grocery store.  And you herd them around the store and grab them out of the way before they run into random shoppers.  You tell your son to stop poking his fingers into the cellophane wrapping on the veggie trays.  You nearly run over your daughter's foot because she insists on walking in front of you.  You ask why your older son just made the baby cry.  You huff.  And you puff.  And you want to blow something down.

But you don't.  You get your stuff.  And you get to the register.

And then you leave.  

Kind of deflated.  You just want to get home, back to your nice little home where it's okay if the kids are crazy and nobody cares if they're loud and I don't have to worry about...anything.  I can just feed them lunch and send them happily off to nap.

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In the middle of all of this, I stopped.  There, outside the grocery store, was a woman.  She had an older child, a baby in a carrier, and a sign.  

"Please help.  I just lost my job.  I have 4 kids." 

I've seen people hold signs before.  Sometimes, if I have the cash, I'll pass it on.  But she was different.  I was having a hard day (and really, how hard had my day actually been?).  She was a mom too, and she was having a hard...week? month?

I didn't have any cash on me, nothing really, to give, except for a prayer.  So I said a little prayer.  

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I don't want to minimize the struggles that I've been dealing with today.  Being a mom is tough, and I rarely feel like I have it all together.  We've all had days like today, when nothing seems right, even if nothing is really wrong.   

I needed a reminder of the many good things that I have.  Even if we don't have much, most of us have a roof over our heads and something to put in our tummies.  I am thankful for those things.  I am thankful for our health.  I am thankful for my kids, for the opportunity to raise them and love them.  I am thankful for my husband. 

Sometimes being a mom is hard.  But I wouldn't trade my life.  I wouldn't give my kids back if I could.  

I'm going to see it through. 

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